Shame

So, I started this whole reading challenge, easily downshifted into the life of the unemployed, and got ready to feel superior to the masses due to my mad crazy reading skillz (yes, that's with a Z, my friends. I'm a machine). Then, out of the blue, my friends start DISCUSSING the books they are reading and having insightful things to say. Well.....shit.

This is when I begin to feel the shame. I should add that this began happening about two weeks ago, so it is wicked slow acting shame, but there you go.

I AM way ahead in the whole "page count" category, but I realize that my reading taste, compared to that of the smarties with whom I choose to spend my time, may be quite lacking. I would say, "Screw it; it's summer," but when the thermometer reads 50 and the books aren't all that different than when the thermometer reads 20..... Um..... I'm beginning to think that if books were booze, I would be the chick at the bar strung out on Pabst Blue Ribbon.

I'll set the stage. I finally decided to unpack from the move a year and a half ago, so a lot of my day is spent trying on clothes that used to fit. Then, natch, the rest of the day is spent in sweats and drinking. Don't judge me. The funny thing is that in the same section of my closet I will find things that used to be loose that are now unzippable, but I also find things that used to be wicked tight that now fall off me. Clearly, this doesn't mean I'm necessarily becoming the human pudding pop I have always had inside me...... I've decided to blame the fabrics and the weather. Project Runway starts in a few weeks. I'll find some excuse that doesn't make me switch to the creepy olive oil mayonnaise. God bless Tim Gunn.

Mornings, though, are my relaxation time. I actually have the most energy in the early morning, but right after their morning ablutions is when the pack settles down for their long winter's nap, and one learns to adapt. Because I love my partner in crime, I've moved the 'puter up to my "office" (read, a place to put all the tacky crap I've picked up along the way that the Crimefighter really doesn't want to see on the mantle even though my acrylic polar bears bequeathed to me by a student would look EXCELLENT up there), and I try to spend at least an hour every morning doing something that doesn't involve raising my blood pressure talking to silly deluded people from South Carolina about how I'm not fulfilling my role as the Crimefighter's "helpmate" and who do I think I am to take a vacation by myself and not give him babies? (The answer, by the way, is that Gerry likes having the house to himself during baseball season, and if I presented him with a baby, he would want to exchange it for a handy attachment for the riding lawnmower..... sorry. It's who we are).

So, 2 Crimefighting Sidekicks at my feet, here's what I've made it through this summer, bookwards:

• Cinderella Ate my Daughter by Peggy Orenstein. I've loved what Orenstein has to say about American girls since I encountered Schoolgirls in an Intro to Education course in college. This book was a strong start to the summer. It helped put into words the unsettled feelings I have with the American Girls dolls and the Disney Princess line. Above all, it made me really happy not to have to raise a daughter in contemporary American society. I've never been a big fan of damned if you do and damned if you don't situations. A very even-handed approach to a landscape of peril.
• Fablehaven: Grip of the Shadow Plague by Brandon Mull. This is a fun middle school series. I'm fascinated by re-tellings of fairy tales, and I'm a fantasy novel reader. Would that these kinds of books were around when I was growing up. I probably could have gotten my full-on geek on much sooner. Two kids work with their aging grandparents to protect fairy creatures from the outside world (and protect the outside world from the fairy creatures). A nice mix of creatures acting as they do in classic literature and those who are simply misunderstood. Good for people who liked the Sisters Grimm series but have outgrown its reading level.
• Savannah Blues by Mary Kay Andrews. Every now and again (like when it's really really cold outside) I like to read a good round of silly Southern literature. Andrews is better than the standard chick lit fare. Her characters are a little more interesting than the herd of drawling heroines that line the shelves at Barnes and Noble. That said, this one took me longer than you would think. I did find myself caring more about the information on antiques and home renovation than the relationships.
• Belle Weather by Celia Rivenbark. Love Celia. A series of essays on moving into a new house. I laughed at some of them until it hurt. While we moved a year ago, I spent most of last summer laid up, so now is when we are really getting into the arguments about wall colors and new furniture.
• Fundraising the Dead by Sheila Connolly. Your standard $7.99 paperback mystery series. Not terrible, but I didn't run out and buy the rest of them. Mystery set in a museum. I knew whodunnit by about page 12 (hint: don't make the shifty-eyed dog QUITE so shifty-eyed. KThxBye.). This is also the first author in the list (I'm going in order) that I had to look up on Amazon. That says something, I think.
• Miss Julia Rocks the Cradle by Ann Ross. I like this series. It reads quickly and reminds me of all the fine older Southern ladies from my hometown. I recommend this one to anyone who would like their older parents (especially Moms) to read more. The basic premise is that a widowed wealthy Southern lady finds out her husband had a protracted affair with a younger woman that resulted in a son, her dead husband's only heir. Through a series of wacky hi-jinks that make for delightful reading, Miss Julia decides to embrace the mistress and her son. Throughout the series, they all become a family, with new additions in almost every book. This is fun and sweet and counteracts the nightly news well on one of those evenings where you just can't care anymore. This series is one of those old friends I catch up with when I have the time. I'm not at the bookstore the Tuesday it comes out in hardcover, but I make sure to stop in and say hello when I have some free time.)
  
• Rowan Hood by Nancy Springer. My first audio book of the trip down the Eastern Seaboard. Tales of Robin Hood's daughter after the death of her mother. A quest to find Robin Hood. An interesting take without much actual history. The Merry Men are a fun lot, though. It describes well "the other side of the story" or how much not fun being a girl would have been then.
• The Mailbox by Audrey Shafer. Audio book #2. This was a tear jerker. A boy bounces out of the foster care system and into the home of his Vietnam War veteran uncle. When the Uncle dies, the boy doesn't want to go back into foster care. Someone (we don't know who) is helping the boy live on his own. An interesting little mystery and some good information about the bonds of vets from the Vietnam War.
• The Roar by Emma Clayton. YA dystopian novel about, among other things, class struggle and eco-terrorism. I think there needs to be (and probably will be) a sequel. I'll reserve judgment for that. I'm not a huge fan of cliffhangers in books. It's unnecessary. If you write engaging characters, then people will read your follow-ups.
• Nation by Terry Pratchett. I have a confession to make. I don't get Terry Pratchett. I feel like I do in Chinatown or New Orleans -- there's something going on that I'm not seeing, and I'm not sure if I want to see it or not. Fantastical/parallel universe tale of a boy caught between boyhood and manhood and between cultures with different agendas. There's a fair amount of "trust no one over 30" as well. Who does?
• Half the Sky by Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn. This is, by far, the most amazing book I've read in a long time. Based on the Mao's assertion that "women hold up half the sky," this is a blatant (they cop to it on page 3) attempt to open Americans' eyes to the desperate plight of women in most of the world. Lots of awesome information. Worth a read by anyone. So moving, I'm thinking about reorganizing my 111 class at Northeastern. I love the authors' assertion that oppression of women is the root cause of terrorism, a thought I've held for a long time. Speaking at a Saudi conference on technology, Bill Gates was asked what he thought the Saudi's chances for being in the top ten of technological advancement in the next ten years. His response? If the Saudis refused to utilize fifty percent of the resources of the country, they shouldn't expect to EVER enter the top quarter, let along the top ten per cent. Saudi women cheered. Too bad our own government doesn't feel like Gates does.
• Spackled and Spooked by Jennie Bentley. Another fun mystery -- this one featuring a crimefighting duo of home restorers. I like the home improvement tips, if the mystery is a bit weak. What the heck? It's fun. I needed it after Half the Sky.
  
• Spider's Bite (Elemental Assassin) by Jennifer Estep. Because every now and again, I miss books with vampires, werewolves, witches and other things that go bump in the night in them. I've read a lot better; I've read a lot worse.
  
• Shine by Lauren Myracle. Myracle is better known for her text message themed books (TT4N, TTYL, L8R G8R, etc) but this one is actually interesting and well-written. A compelling portrait of growing up in a small town that the rest of the world forgot. Reminded me a lot of the town I grew up in and how hard it is for a lot of people to get out. Oh, and there's a meth ring and gay bashing and alcoholics...... so it reflects contemporary small town society accurately if not prettily.

And there you have it. A buttload of books, very few of which I would recommend to everyone without a coda. The exception is Half the Sky. Truly moving. Cinderella Ate my Daughter is also delightful, to a certain audience anyway. Right now, I am trying to settle into the next one I will finish. Working on a book about gypsies (non-fiction), a YA fairy tale retelling, a work of short stories, and The Happiness Project which is awesome so far but needs to be read in pieces.

And that is my shame sort of lifting.......